I used to avoid talking about periods, sex, or my body in general onstage because what if everyone found out I was a girl?!
For many people, jokes about physically being a woman are lumped in with "cheap" sexual humor, which is frustrating because writing about gender is so different from writing about sexuality.
They say to "write what you know," but when it comes to female experiences, it's more, "write what you know, except for that... that's gross."
I had difficulty navigating between being a comedian and a woman because many people think the two are mutually exclusive, and I am a desperate people-pleaser.
I'm embarrassed to say that I used to shy away from female comedians that talked about sex because the people around me told me that wasn't funny, and I believed them. Now that I'm older and a little wiser, I see the difference between things that are not funny and the people that say they aren't. Because I've watched set after set where a woman gets snarky comments over sex jokes that, had their male peers written, would have crushed. Countless female audience members have introduced themselves after the show and said, " I don't like female comedians, but you were funny!" while their husband silently nods along. I've been in a conversation about people's aversion to female-focused comedy, and there's always some guy who says it isn't about what we're saying. It's how we say it. Meanwhile, I have been at a comedy club while a man walks onstage wearing nothing but a sock to cover his penis. You tell me: Who is alienating the audience with their "bits"?"
In the spirit of this post, here are some of my "dirtiest" jokes:
Why do they call periods a "monthly visitor" when they feel more like a "home invasion"?
They say that the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else, but what if I like being on top?
When a guy asks me where I want him to cum I like to make a fun joke and say, "to dinner with my parents!".
I slept with a Philosophy grad student, and now I can't stop asking myself, "Why?"
Dating a guy who sleeps on an air mattress is tricky because you're always trying to finish before the bed does.
They say the eating habits you have as a kid affect your diet as an adult, but I don't remember eating pussy like a kid.
I'm bisexual, but I prefer to be called a lesbi-and.
Have you ever been so hungry that when the food comes, so do you?